…fear not. I did make it back from the beach party, but in rather a sorry state and with a two day hangover. As always happens with such a drunken night, pictures don’t really get taken. There are a few awful ones which I’m sure The Boy has shared, but I shall not.
I have been feeling a little bit adrift recently. Perhaps it is my 26th Birthday zooming up on me in a few weeks, or perhaps it was the news that two of my closest friends are now working as full blown solicitors…but I feel like I’m getting left behind.
When I was younger, I though that by this age, I’d be married and thinking about my family. As I got older, I realised that I still felt like a young girl and that it just wasn’t realistic. It was replaced when I got to Uni by thinking that I would have an amazing career (God knows what I thought it would be in) with a house and a hot car….which never happened because I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my work life or what direction to go in.
I found a direction to head in with my last job and just went crashing into that thinking it seemed as good as anything else I’d though of…and I was doing ok at it…but I left to come to Spain…
I never ever thought I would be living in another country. Ever. Don’t get me wrong, of course I love it and the way of life suits me much more out here and my brain doesn’t give way to the big grey cloud nearly as often out here….but that brain is just now turning to mush because it isn’t being used.
I can’t work out if it’s time that I knuckled down and got started on carving out a career for myself (which would more than likely involve moving back to the UK at some point in the future) and actually got to where I though I would be by now….or do I have a complete overhaul again and re-think where it actually is that I’m going and if I want to be going there?
Do I stop trying to work out what I should be doing and what career path I should be taking? Do I decide that I want to live in as many different places in the world as I can and who cares what job I have? Do I focus on maybe learning how to do something new, teach myself new things, so that when I do know where I want to go with my career, I have more tools at my disposal?
Are you where you wanted to be? Do you even know where you’re going? Or are you just enjoying the ride?