There’s nothing like a funeral to put things in perspective, especially one of a family member, and last week was no exception for me. What resonated most was a reading that was given, and I know I was not alone in walking away feeling like something had to change, I had to change.
... For it matters not, how much we own, the cars…the house…the cash. What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash. So, think about this long and hard. Are there things you’d like to change? For you never know how much time is left that can still be rearranged. ... From 'The Dash' - read the whole poem here.
The ‘dash’ in this poem being the short line between the year of our birth and that of our death. How would someone reading your own eulogy describe what you did in that time, in your life?
It’s something that has been on my mind a lot recently – somewhat of a inter-quarter/mid life crisis. Do I know what am I doing with my life? Is it what I want to do? Am I achieving anything of note? Am I treating people how I would like to be treated myself? Am I acting in the manner that I would like to be best remembered?
I’m pretty sure the answer to all of those questions is ‘no’.
I am almost certainly muddling along from day-to-day. Wasting my life beating myself up, feeling miserable, feeling lonely, waiting to feel ‘well’, being selfish and self-involved, longing for the weekend or the next holiday, sitting at home moaning that I’m doing nothing, wanting it to be Friday when it’s only Monday.
It feels very late in life to be working out who I am but there is still plenty of time to ‘rearrange’ and there’s certainly a whole lot of Monday to Friday, unplanned weekends and moments of feeling vaguely human that I should be making more of.
Time to stop wishing my life away and do something with my ‘dash’.